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Sadly, the euphemism of the week is “second amendment remedies.”

The commander of a ship based in San Diego was recently fired by the Navy for being “unduly familiar” with members of his crew.

A recent New Yorker article reported that an outside auditor assessing a school building project in Nepal was called “very healthy” by locals. This was their euphemism for “massively obese.” According to writer Peter Hessler, while walking from one school to another, the auditor “was overwhelmed by healthiness and had to sit down.”

When an engine blew up on a Quantas flight from Singapore to Sydney, its pilot told 440 passengers that the airplane had a “technical issue.”

To explain his conviction that global warming is natural, incoming House Speaker John Boehner said “Every cow in the world, you know, when they do what they do you’ve got more carbon dioxide.”

The most discussed euphemism of recent times is junk (as in “Don’t touch my junk,” during an airport patdown). How we got from “family jewels” to “junk” escapes me. Today’s junk is yesterday’s stones, marbles, peppercorns and manhood. The euphemisms we use with reflect their times. What does “junk” say about ours?